Intervention

Last Friday I was to meet Mick and Kate for drinks at a local Irish pub after their dinner with Kate's family. Their friends would also be out so I'd have a chance to meet some more young Milwaukeeans.

I was sitting in my apartment alone, just waiting for the agreed time, so I decided to walk to the pub early. I would stop for dinner along the way and it would help kill the time. Well, the walk and pizza were not enough because I arrived too early. But no big deal - I'm confident. I'm secure. I can sit at a bar alone and wait for my friends. Of course I can - but not without drawing the attention of the bartenders.

The bar is cute. It has small rooms because it used to be a home. An Irish band plays in one of the rooms. There's a fireplace. And a host greets you when you enter and helps you to find an appropriate table for your party.

I sat down at the end of the bar and ordered a whiskey and coke. Just that afternoon, I had learned that I had not passed my actuarial exam from November so I was planning my next few months professionally. I thought I was just paranoid, but it seemed like the bartenders were watching and talking about me. After fifteen minutes or so, one of them, I think the owner, approached me. He asked, "How are you doing tonight? Is everything ok?"

"Yes, thank you. I'm good." And then I realized his concern wasn't that my glass was empty, his concern was that my life was empty. I quickly tried to exude confidence. I sat up straighter. I smiled, not just with my mouth, but my eyes too. I said, "Yeah, my friends are running late, but it's no big deal."

He probably didn't believe me; he said with a tone to imply deep concern, "Well if you need anything from us, you just let one of us know, ok?"

"Ok, thanks."

When Mick and Kate arrived, their friends already had a table in another room. Kate retrieved me from the bar and, as always, greeted me with a hug. As we walked to the next room, she ask me, "Why was that bartender grinning at us? What were you talking to her about?" I explained that I had not even talked to that particular bartender, but I don't think that she appreciated the story until we were leaving and all of the waitstaff waved to me and wished me a good night.

Some people have thought that the actions of the staff were strange, but I found them to be honorable. Despite their busy night, the workers were caring and genuine. It was refreshing to find strangers so concerned.