Sweaters

My heating bill for last month (during which I was out of my house for 2 weeks) is $238. I only live in half of a house. And I'm usually cold. I'm going shopping for more sweaters.

2008 Year in Review

January

The year began in a blur. Well, more like a blackout. The first thing I remember in 2008 is throwing up. Things could only go uphill. The weather was extremely cold. My friends and I went out pretty regularly. We established Wednesday Night Bluegrass and I realized that we had been to the German Beer Hall so often that I needed a separate picture folder on my computer just for those nights. At school, a kid fell through the ceiling.

February

Cold weather continued but so did going out with friends. I went cross-country skiing and saw The Lion King. My education continued to grow as did my teaching experience.

March

Christie and I cranked up the heat and threw a beach party. We even bought a palm tree decoration and leis. Trevor took one for the team and manned the grill in the bitter cold. We were turned away from a pancake breakfast because they thought that they “might” run out of maple syrup. Easter and Spring Break were welcome breaks to this first-year teacher.

April

The kickball season began and we actually won games! The Brewers’ season began and they didn’t so much. I could see the end to my first year in education. It would not be my last - though I tried to get a job at another school in the district. I ran in my first 8K for the season and I saw a bell choir.

May

My education class finally came to an end even if it required scrambling to get everything together for my certification. I went to several baseball games and camped with some friends in Illinois. I had my first break-in (for the year). Christie went to Guatemala for 10 days but left her grandmother here. Gram and I hung out. Riversplash! Kicked off summer.

June

I witnessed my first MPS graduation and repeatedly picked up my jaw off the floor – like when the principal quoted scripture during his address. I ran the Beer Run (3 kilometers and 4 official beer stops) in 40 minutes! School ended for the year. Visited Iowa and saw caves and Amanda’s hometown. Drove to Cincinnati for Thomas and Maureen’s wedding. Danced with my friends in a giant grape-vining circle. (I wish I could express how good that moment (and weekend) felt.)

July

Beached in New Jersey with Adina. Received such a bad sunburn that it affected the rest of July. Learned a lesson about SPF - again. Independence Day with the family was a blast. It’s such a good holiday to witness in small towns. Stormed the Bastille (5K). Worked at Bastille Days Festival. Ran to Festa Italiana (5K). Missed registration for the Sausage Race, but managed to hold back tears as I cheered Jon and Emily. Began working for the YMCA’s summer enrichment program. Lived out a favorite bluegrass tune by drinking whiskey for breakfast.

August

Jake and Katie were married. Danced. Saw an old friend from BU. Saw a demolition derby. Ran in a 10 mile race. Lindsey and Mike came to visit and we toured 3 breweries in 3 days. Convinced them that Milwaukee is a great place. Cousin Lindsey made a comment to me that she didn’t know I was so weird. We continued to grill by the lake on Sunday evenings. Mom and Dad came to visit for a night.

September

School’s back! I get my schedule a day or two before classes begin and I get an ominous feeling about how the year is going to run. Kickball started but we lose more often than last season. Bronwyn visits at the end of the month. My house is broken into again. I buy my third laptop and fourth camera for the year. I interact with the police multiple times including a frisking! and a hit-and-run. I threw a party. I saw Itzhak Perlman.

October

The Brewers made it to the playoffs! They lost to the eventual champs, Philadelphia. We spread our love for Ed Sedar, first base coach of the Milwaukee Brewers, by selling t-shirts that say, “Get to 1st Base with Ed”. The Homecoming Pep Rally led to a riot at school. My grandfather died and I made a trip home for a weekend. I ran in a 9 mile race in 1 hour and 29 minutes.

November

Obama won the election and I felt so much better about my country. Dan Goldin Day grew to include 14 people at the Lakefront Brewery. The evening ended with dancing to Billy Ocean and Journey. I began to see how my circle of friends is evolving. I attended Ann and Nick’s wedding in Madison. This was the first wedding that I attended that I knew the couple for their entire courtship.

December

Christie and I threw a successful Ugly Christmas Sweater Party with only a week to plan. Advent felt very short and I scrambled to get things together before my drive home. Temperatures and snow fell. I drove to Nashville to welcome 2009 amidst old friends.

Holiday Travel Day 1

My 700 mile drive to Pennsylvania has become a great deal more exciting this year with a trunk full of microbrew beer purchased for my father and temperatures below zero. I have to check it constantly to be sure that the bottles have not exploded. So far I've only lost a growler (64 fl. oz.) of hard root beer. Luckily, it only "exploded" a little, and I cleaned up the "ice" with no problem. I hope I don't have to explain to any police officers that my containers were not opened by me, but by nature. And I'm sure the front desk at the hotel isn't wondering what I'm doing with 3 cases of beer in my room. Ah, Cleveland.

Snow Day!

On Friday, school was canceled and my Christmas holiday began one day earlier than expected. Some of the younger teachers were planning on going out after school, but the snow storm threw off our plans. I was determined, and so was Erick, (who learned my first name this week so that we would not have the awkward situation of him calling me Mr. C. at the bar). Mario also came out with us - he's not a teacher, he just likes to drink beer.

When I was getting ready for the evening, I contemplated wearing dancing-friendly attire, but then figured that I would probably not end up dancing if I were hanging out with two dudes, especially if the three of us did not know each other very well. I was wrong. I was very wrong.

The night started at Nessun Dorma, where noone sleeps. I like Nessun Dorma; it's laid back, the staff is friendly, and the beer selection is extensive. Our bartender was cute and several times I caught her smiling at our conversations, on which she was eavesdropping.

We left ND at about midnight and worked our way to another Riverwest establishment, the Riverhorse ("hippopotamus" in Ancient Greek). I usually like the Riverhorse but on Friday night we stuck out like nerds at a punk bar. This was probably because we were nerds at a punk bar. So, I did what made sense and pulled out my new camera to take pictures. Actually I only took one picture. This picture:
I think it captures the mood of the night pretty well. We only lasted for one drink at the Riverhorse - definitely enough time for me to make two comments about translations of bar names in foreign languages.

I'm not sure who suggested Mad Planet, but it's always a good suggestion. MP is only open on weekends and every Friday is 80s Night. Mad Planet is the type of place where anything goes. It has all types of people and outfits range from bridesmaid's dresses to flannel (and flannel bridesmaid's dresses). So, my snowboots were just fine. I don't remember what songs were played (definitely no MJ, Madonna, nor JBJ) but I spent a good amount of time on the dance floor. I now realize that I do not have any bloggable stories from MP, which is too bad because the place has so much potential.

This was a great way to begin my holiday break. I hope it's just a preview of what's to come: good food, good drinks, good friends.

Secret Santa

Did I tell you that my Secret Santa at work left me a thong? It's a tuxedo thong so it has a little bow tie on the front and tails in the back. Most of the staff knows about this even though our gift exchange is limited to the math department.

Today "Santa" left me some novelty condoms. Do you know what Santa leaves for the other teachers? Julie received a candle. Charles got some mixed nuts and candy. Dave received a gift card to a coffee shop. I got novelty condoms and a thong. My fear is that when I finally bring this stuff home, I'm going to die in a car crash and there will be reports of the teacher with the strange fetishes.

Staff Christmas Party

Karaoke Machine + a bartender giving me cheap drinks = a lasting impression on my coworkers

I sang the following songs over the course of the night:

Minnie the Moocher
Sweet Caroline (with the math department)
Short Skirt, Long Jacket
Lollipop by Lil' Wayne (duet with Wendy, the office lady)
Lola
Paradise by the Dashboard Light (duet with Steve)
Midnight Train to Georgia (as a Pip!)
Fat Bottomed Girls
Dancing Queen (with the English department)
Seasons of Love (yeah, numbers!)

Teaching

I had two conversations with two different classes yesterday regarding the number of states in the Union. More than one of my students thinks that there are 52 states in the country! And I'm still not sure if they believe me and the rest of the class.

Workplace hazards

We had 2 fights in the math corridor yesterday. I witnessed a kid with blood gushing out of his mouth. Because he was yelling so much (profanity and threats at the other student) he ended up spitting blood in the face of another teacher. Now this teacher has to for testing to make sure he hasn't contracted any diseases. Another teacher still gets tested every 6 months for AIDS after being bitten by a student last year.

Today there was a mob of students milling about the hallway during 3rd period. I tried to break them up with an English teacher and the students laughed at us. Where was security? Where were the cops? Where was administration?

During our staff meeting this morning, I received no reassurance from the principal. He's in over his head. And I'm looking for another school at which to teach.

Here we come

I have been thinking a great deal about my last post since I went to church on Sunday. The liturgy and pastor's sermon seemed to go well with my cola and whiskey musings. This week's liturgy was the Mark passage where John the Baptist talks about Jesus by saying that he (John) is only preparing the way for One greater than he. The pastor's sermon then went on to say that Jesus made remarks that He was preparing the way for those who would do even greater things - meaning us.

During the sermon, all of the biblical talk was then tied to the history of our congregation because Sunday was the annual meeting for our local church, during which we analyze the prior year and plan for the upcoming. We're going through some tough financial straits, but due to our hard work, we're turning things around. Luckily our predecessors planned for lean times like these, and hopefully the present congregants will continue to look forward as they deal with today's issues. The minister made a comment that I think is important for all of us to remember, especially those of us that are relatively young. She said, "Some day the youngest person in the room may be the oldest person in the room." As a teacher, that summed up what keeps me going every day. We have to prepare the way for the people that will one day lead our society. We have to teach. We have to guide. We have to clean up our messes. And we have to prepare.

We have to be the whiskey that makes the skunky beer go down a little easier later on in the night.

Thinking

I don't know why I waste my time on beer. Whiskey is so much more effective. I'm drinking it now just to help the soda go down.

Purchases

I bought my first candle this week. It was $20 on sale. I don't know why, but I feel as if my life is different now. I had similar feeling when I bought my first 3-hole punch. It seems like a rite of passage - I'm one more step into adulthood. Christie, stop reading now. I accidentally left it burning while I was out this weekend - for 5 hours.

I also bought a vest. It looks good, but it does not look like something I would wear. Christie supported the purchase, but only because she's a good friend. She thinks wearing a vest is weird. Could this be some strange quarter-life crisis? When/if I buy a camera (my 4th for the year) I'll post a picture of my new vest, with a candle burning in the background.

Dan Goldin Day

We had 14 people at the brewery to celebrate Dan Goldin Day this year. And some of them didn't even know they were out for the holiday until they arrived and I told them. I had not wanted them to feel any pressure to buy gifts or get dressed up special. A good time was had by all - or so I was told. The highlight of my evening was certainly dancing to Billy Ocean's "Get out of my Dreams". My new friends were mega-impressed when I called a Journey song seconds before it played. "Just another Dan Goldin Day miracle," I explained to them. Mario told me later this weekend that Hall & Oates and Billy Ocean had not had such large roles in his life until he started hanging out with me and Jon. This was before he heard Christie and me sing "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" at the pizza place on Saturday afternoon.

On-the-job Training

Blogger is in Japanese! So is google! What is wrong with my computer? I had to guess at what links would bring me to this page. At least when my computer is in Spanish I can make reasonable guesses as to what words mean.

Anyway, I wanted to write about a student today, who showed me a little bit of the ashes of his dead mother. She died earlier this year. The ashes were in a little gold cross that he wore around his neck. It was sad and I didn't know what to say. I asked him where his family keeps the urn. They don't teach you things like this in education classes.

Class

The textbook mentions Macbeth because they assume that all high school students would be familiar with Shakespeare's greatest plays.

Me: Does anyone know what Macbeth is?
12th grade student: Yeah, I do. He's a crime-fighting dog.
Me: Ummm...You're thinking of McGruff.

Also, this was one of my best students. He's at least making associations with the words I use in class.

Sprecken the Deutsch?

Great, now everything is in Dutch on my computer. The extent of my Dutch is houseboatmuseum, which, believe it or not, translates to "houseboat museum."

Espanol

Why is my home page now in Spanish? I don't want to use la google for my internet searches. How did my computer become bilingual overnight?

Full Saturday

On Saturday morning I ran 15 kilometers with Jon and Mario. Actually, I only ran with Mario - Jon left us in his dust. I finished in 1 hour 29 minutes - a new world record! And by "world" I mean within my house. My eight remaining toe nails are still connected to my feet and I have no blisters. Unfortunately though, I cannot lift my legs to go up stairs. I should have stretched more and sat in the ice bath longer. I also wish I had known that there would be unlimited free beer after the race. I would not have driven to the race.

Saturday evening I went to an indoor soccer game in which Jon and several of our other friends played. They easily lost, but I missed the end because I ended up going to the Emergency Room with Adrienne and Tad, her boyfriend who was kicked in the knee within 8 seconds of running onto the "field". His knee cap ended up being a few inches from where it should have been. He was able to leave the hospital on crutches but not after we spent a few hours there. I haven't been to the ER since I lived in the same city as Jackie. She made every holiday exciting.

Grandpa

My grandfather died last Friday and I made a sudden trip to Pennsylvania over the weekend. Despite the reasons for the trip, I greatly enjoyed the time with my family. It was four days spent laughing and crying - but mostly laughing. Grandpa was a great man who taught his family by example. He was stern, but as he got older he mellowed out and I always looked forward to my visits with him over the holidays. He told decent jokes that were always (usually) clean.

Some of my fond memories of him include when we left him at the restaurant after celebrating his birthday. He paid for the meal. And as he was taking care of the bill, we got into our cars and left. Because people had switched cars, no one realized that he was not in any of the cars until we were back at his house.

This is also the grandfather for whom I made jello shots on his 80th birthday.

The following video is him singing around the camp fire at a family party. I have been singing this song to myself all week

And Then I Saw My Boss Naked

I had a rough Tuesday.

5:30 - Woke up, got outta bed

7:00 - Arrived at school for grading

7:30 - Staff meeting. Watched a video about generic drugs. Sat through lecture from principal about being on time. Reminded that Open House was that evening from 5 to 7.

8:30 - Students begin to trickle into classes because there is still no tardy policy!

9:30 - 3:40 - "taught" classes. By "taught" I mean that I presented information to scores of people although their reception was limited. Put up with "Bum Day" the second day of the Spirit Week from hell. How does smearing white powder under your nose as if it were coke qualify as spirit-building?

4:00 - Dinner with the new teacher because he's on the edge. I don't know if it's the edge of quitting or going postal, but it's the edge of something. Listened to his struggles.

5:00 - 7:00 - Open House. No administration was in the building to give us direction but I was able to get some work done.

7:30 - Swam a mile at the gym

8:20 - Showered

8:22 - Went to the locker room. Saw my principal wearing only his glasses. Because I wasn't wearing my glasses I did not recognize him until I was about a meter away. I struggled through an awkward "Hey, how are you?" and wondered whether I should call him "Mr. _______" or by his first name, which I have never actually done. It just doesn't seem right to address someone formally when they are wearing the most informal of outfits.

8:26 - Drove home

8:45 - Arrived home

8:46 - Began my whiskey-tastic evening

Kickball Injuries

Last week I made a great play in kickball. I slid into home plate during the last play of the game. It would have been very dramatic if I hadn't been out at 2nd, and 3rd. I was the last out of the game, we were down by 14 points, and I thought to myself, "Who cares about rules - I'm just gonna keep on running until they stop me." And nobody did. So, I kept running. And to end the inning on a ridiculous note, I decided to slide into home. However, I don't know how to slide, so it was more like falling with gusto. My team loved it. Unfortunately I cut up my knee and I was bleeding for the rest of the night. The blood would not have been such a big deal except I was going to a party afterwards, at which I only knew a few people. I made a great first impression with my blood running down my leg and dirt spots all over my clothes. It didn't help that everyone else was dressed up as if they were headed to the symphony. I stuck out like a sore thumb - or a nailless toe, which I currently have two of. But that's a different story.

This week at kickball I was pelted in the face with the kickball. I know it's just a kickball, but John throws hard and I did nothing to remove myself from the missile's path, which would have ended at the opponent and resulted in the inning's last out. Unfortunately, my face was in the way and I was left dazed and confused. Seriously, my face was tingly for the next 3 innings and I'm sure it was not due to all of the candy corn consumed in the first inning.

I'm preemptively placing myself on the DL for next week's game.